How to beat an idiot in an argument

Hoo boy, here we go.

*Note: Generally not taking the bait is the best way in life. But sometimes we are not in a position to do that. 

Say you’re stuck in a frustrating debate or argument with them. Or you MUST reach a compromise with them. You want it to stop for the love of god. 

Here’s how to flip things around (most of the time) using a hack called strategic concession:

1. Agree with something they said, repeating it back to them in the way that they said it. That’s Agreement 1. 

2. Agree with a related principle (like why they might think the way they do), to show you definitely understand where they are coming from. That’s Agreement 2. 

3. Only AFTER that do you make your own point.

Here’s a very important example, using an all-too-common but devastating problem:

You’re arguing with a McDonald’s worker who insists there is a 2 ketchup packet limit per person. Your point of view is that you should have as many as you need.

This lunatic shuts you down with, ”You only need 2 ketchups. That’s plenty. No one needs more than 2 ketchups.” 

Ready?

Here’s how to strategic the shiz out of the concession:

• Agreement 1: "You’re absolutely right. Ketchup is a precious commodity. It’s like the liquid gold of fast food.”

• Agreement 2: “You have to deal with monsters who grab 10 packets and waste them. Or drop them on the floor, so you’re stuck cleaning it up. That ain’t right!” 

• Your own point: "But I did order a large fry. I take ketchup distribution very seriously. So you don’t have to worry about waste or cleaning up after me. Would you make an exception this time?“

Chances are you’ll get that ketchup. Here’s why strategic concession works:

• It disarms the other person. You show them you’re listening and you understand. You’re giving them a win. They’re less likely to see you as a troublemaker. 

• It creates rapport. Agreeing = respect.

• It makes it harder for them to dismiss your point when you’re aligned with them on their points.

Keep trying till you perfect your technique. Don’t worry, you’ll never run out of idiots to practice on. 

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This post is an excerpt from Good Stuff to Read When You’re About to Lose Your Shit. Fancy a copy? They’re here.